Tip of the Mask, Wag of the Mouthguard….Weekend Wrap up in the NHL

Wow what an exciting first three days of this 10-11 Season! I could scarcely get to sleep last night and not just because My Wings ruined Buck Twenty Kane’s banner party. It was coconut icing on German chocolate cake. Damn. Now I 'm hungry for cake.

Maybe it would just be best if we just get started, or at least get my homer-ism out of the way, no?  I do have a need to gush! Oh come on, cut me a slice. You think you can do better? 

Doubt it, no one can move Homer from the Crease...

First: a Tip of the Mask to My Amazing Detroit Red Wings

Anyone else watch this weekend's Wings games and feel like we were back in the spring of '08?

I love feeling the excitement of watching an amazing year unfold, and this one already looks like the 2009-2010 I dreamt of.  Babs putting the D-H-Z line back together is bags of fun, of course,  but what is so interesting to me is the change in both Pasha and Zets (and arguably Homer too). They all have grown their game so differently since 2008. Zetterburg has become much scrappier and tougher in the crease where he can be so deadly and Pavel Datsyuk’s takeaway skills are the best in the league, nevermind how he cuts through defenders like a hot knife in butter.  fughedaboutit.

I have been secretly thinking this for about 3 seasons and for the first time ever, feel a fair degree of confidence in predicting that Pavel Datsyuk may in fact be the best all around player this league has ever seen. Seriously, I am sticking with it and owning this observation. Bring it, if you think someone out there has more.

So I am wondering what this line will evolve into and if by midseason we will see Pasha and Hank flying down the ice with the telekinetic no look passes whizzing through defender skates like we used to in 2008.  Can't wait to find out.

Even more exciting is our boy Val- "2Ts, 2Ps"-Filppula, eh? Ever since he channeled Bobby Orr (and arguably did it a bit better that No. 3) in ’08, I have waited for great things from Filps.  Sure he still has his gangly "colt out of the starting gate" moments, but come on- the Kid gets excited! So far, putting him on the ice with a healthy Mule and Bertz seems pure genius. So much so that I am struggling not to drop Patrick Sharp and pick Filps up in my Fantasy League.

AND the cherry on top??? The Hudded Helm line is back. I cannot wait for Happy to get his legs again and see Darren and Jiri fly down the ice like they did 2 years ago.

Let’s not forget, Ozzie standing solid in net and Jimmy MF Howard with a damn shutout against the Thucks!!!  

Ok, enough Wings Love fest- Holland knows I could go on and on…

A Wag of the Mouthguard:

To the fighty fighty Thucks. Geebuz, even when this gutted team sucks, and they lost their star antagonist they still seem to think hockey has nothing to do with skill. I am so over Anaheim. 

I mean, you have to pretty much be the deucebags of the league to compel Pavel Datsyuk to fight. BTW, Corey Perry how pathetic do you have to be to get your arse handed to you by a perpetual Lady Bing winner?

Gordie Howe Hat Tricks all around! Three Orange Whips for Datsyukian Dekes!

Query: which team has been more profoundly gutted, Ducks or Hawks? Discuss! Vote!

Tip of the Mask:

To the Tampa Bay Lightning who dominated an improved Atlanta team last night. Finally we might get to see what all that hodge podge of talent can do. They must be feeling good about the Yzerman “acquisition”…. Oh and if Mike Smith is available in your fantasy league, I am betting that its a shrewd pick up, say if you have a Carey Price to dump…

Wag of the Mouthguard:

To San Jose, and particularly Patrick Marleau. Sigh. Get over yourselves, and get out of your heads. geebuz. From top to bottom, your entire organization spent the summer making knee jerk idiotic decisions, starting with letting Nabby go. Sorry, its true. You will never be anything more than Second Rounders if you can’t stay the course, figure out what your goddamn game plan is and stick with it, inspire some confidence in the organization – especially your key players- and believe in yourselves.

Seriously. The only problem you all have is an organizational parasite called fear and self loathing. You will never win anything significant if you don’t find a way to truly believe in yourselves.

And get Nabby back you fools. If you cannot recall what he did in 2008, your short sightedness will break you.

(you get some props for picking Lilja up though- Andres: be safe, watch your head bro.)

Monday Edit: NHL.com is reporting Andres Lilja has signed with the Ducks. This scares the crap out of me for all the wrong reasons. I think this move will concuss Andreas right out of the league and into a wheelchair with sippy cup holder.... This is a bad move for Lilja's health. Dammit.

Tip of the Mask:

To the LA Kings for coming on strong again this year. When will the Boys in Black start earning your respect people? They are the real deal, and they are coming for your daughters.

Wag of the Mouthguard/Tip of the Mask:

To Hobey! You let a Rook score a hat trick on you? I still love you, and that is all I will say, except: Snap out of it!!!! 

Of course we must give the corollary tip of the mask to the kid, Derek Stephan, only the 4^th rookie to open his very first NHL game with a hat trick. Nice interview too, giving all the props to his linesmen. Golf claps all around! How about a Fresca?

Tip of the Mask:

To Ethan Moreau for reminding everyone that he is still alive. Watch Columbus this year kids- they have a damn fire lit under their arses.

Wag of the Mouthguard:

Refs and Officials for so far failing to take Rule 48 seriously. Screw you League. No one wants smashmouth hockey at the expense of athlete careers- so get your shixsa together and stop the career ending injuries.

Tip of the Mask:

To Radim Vrbata for a seriously cool name and for schooling the Bruins in Prague.

Wag of the Mouthguard:

To Concussions. Faulk you concussions, and Puck anyone who intentionally hits a head or behaves recklessly to put a guy's head in danger. Speaking of which:

All our well wishes, strongest hopes for speedy recovery and  positive thoughts go out to those already hit with concussions and injuries

Ondrej Pavelec: Kid, get well. You're way too young to be concussed out of the league.  

Johnny Tavares: Islanders need you!

Pekka Renne: Bro get well. Your team needs you. See, Dan Ellis took his tiny bags of money and headed south.

Marc Savard: Really? already?

J. Spezza: See Savard comment.

J. Ericsson: See Savard/Spezza.

Patrick Sharp: you suck and you speared Nic Lidstrom in the Balls, so I hope you end up on IR for a long time even though it will screw my fantasy team.